True Story

If people saw the way I eat lunch after a 2-3 hour morning gym session, I would be so embarrassed, I'd probably never show my face again. True story.

Two nights in a row, it was 10:00 PM before I realized I had forgotten to feed my dogs dinner. They were driving me crazy and that's when it dawned on me that they must be hungry. Ooops. (I'd be a terrible mother). True story.

My personal trainer says I shouldn't eat carbs after 5:00 PM. I cheat by putting croutons on my salad. True story.

My blog post titled "Confessions" has by far the most views than all of the other posts! For some reason, I find that quite comical. True story.

I gave myself the title "Recycling and Compost Nazi". It's something I'm actually quite proud of. True story.

If you chew gum while cutting onions, your eyes won't water. True story.

I find it weird that my dogs have thumbs. True story.

R and I quote the tv series "Friends" and "King of Queens" in our everyday jargon. True story.

And we vote on Dancing With The Stars. Often we disagree on who we want to vote for, so we compromise by playing Rock, Paper, Scissors. True story.

I read my horoscope every morning. True story.

I've never seen or read the Harry Potter series or the Lord of the Rings series. I'm pretty confident that I'm not missing out on much. True story.

My dad used to walk around the house turning off all the lights while shouting (or sometimes singing) "Why are all the bloody lights on?!" I find myself doing the same thing. True story.

My dad also used to tell me I would always leave the kitchen cabinets open and I never thought I did; until I moved into my own house, that is. Let's just say it's not an uncommon occurrence to walk in my kitchen and see the cabinets wide open. So apparently I do. True story.

Last week I killed a spider that ran across my carpet with L Dog's paw while he was sleeping. He slept right through it though. True story.

A few more thoughts I've recently had that have somewhat boggled my mind:

Why is it that the three main radio stations here insist upon playing the same five songs over and over? We have decades and decades of great music, why must we hear only the songs that came out just two months ago???

What's the trick to peeling a hard boiled egg and keeping the egg shell in as few pieces as possible?

Why are we still traveling in cars as opposed to hover crafts?

Is "cannot" one word or two? And if it is only one, why aren't "must not", "have not" and "should not" only one word as well?

Why is it that when I asked the cashier to "please bag my groceries in as few bags as possible" she proceeds to double bag a bag with only frozen chicken breasts in it?

Perhaps for the same reason she didn't ask to see a picture ID when she asked to see my credit card when the back clearly reads "Please See ID" in the place where my signature is supposed to be? Just a thought.

Also, can someone please explain to me how facebook is now worth 7.9 BILLION DOLLARS?! That is just plain crazy.

Who's idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"? That's just evil!

And why are we still contemplating the chicken and egg thing? The chicken came first. Noah didn't take a couple of eggs on the ark, he took two chickens. Simple as that.

And last but not least: I saw this in an email, as I'm sure most of you have as well, but I honestly don't know the answer to this question:

Which is worse?

Dogs?


Or kids?

You tell me.